San Francisco Sentinel
December 29, 1989
Street Talk
‘Send In the Lions’
By Doris Fish
I considered going to Mass on Christmas. My boyfriend and I spent the holidays with his family. I just couldn’t do it. My youthful animosity towards the Church of Rome has recently been rekindled, ironically at the same time that my interest in things not of this world has grown. I was thrilled when I read of the vandalism at St. Maytag’s, though I hasten to add, I do not think physical abuse, even of inanimate objects, will really change the Roman Church.
The only person I really love in that organization is the “Virgin” Mary. She is the personification of the female side of God. All the male images of God were always foreign to me but she always seemed nice. She didn’t send anyone to Hell, no wars were fought in Her name, and She didn’t tell anyone how to live their lives. And she was a good Jewish mother.
I can’t help remembering a wonderful show that Jacqueline Hyde scripted for us in Sydney many years ago. It was Easter, I was Mary Magdalene, Jacquie was Jesus’ Mother and a fabulous woman by the name of Les Bean played the poor unfortunate Jesus on the cross. Mary and Mary were both blaming each other for His demise, “You and those arty friends of His, those hippie fishermen, caused this. We wanted him To be a carpenter. His father, Joseph taught Him everything. He was a good boy until he met you!”
“It’s all your fault!” I countered, “You didn’t let Him out of the house till He was thirty. And all that nonsense you taught Him about your being a virgin and His father being God really screwed Him up! This is an Olde Worlde Jewish community, that sort of thing is not kosher in these parts!”
Mary, herself, may not have found it amusing but she would not have condemned us. And that is the difference between Heaven and Earth. We’re all God’s “wicked” children learning how to behave. None of us is perfect enough to burden others with blame.
Christians have been giving Christianity a bad name. The early Christians were people probably akin to Mother Theresa (I’ve never heard her say a bad word about anybody, not even her photographers) and it was not until this cult became the religion of the Roman emperor Constantine that it began to evolve into the current Church of Rome, a very rich and powerful organization, based more on Roman standards than true Christian ethics.
Perhaps one day I’ll forgive those misguided misogynistic homophobes of the Rotten Roman Cult but I’m still a “wicked” child who sees hypocrisy and injustice and wants to lash out at its perpetrators. Perhaps when I’m older I’ll be wise enough to appreciate the philosophy that says that nothing matters, all existence on the plane is an illusion, and there’s really nothing to be upset about. Kind of similar to “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”.
In fact, this is very similar to the words of Our Lady of Guadalupe. “Listen, my son, to what I tell you now: do not be troubled nor disturbed by anything; do not fear illness nor any other distressing occurrence, nor pain. Am I not your mother? Am I not life and health? Have I not placed you on my lap and made you my responsibility? Do you need anything else?” She said this in the Aztec tongue when she appeared to a Mexican native 400 years ago. My favorite part of the miracle is the Holy Drag, a fabulous green, pink and gold Aztec princess costume. The Aztec Mary is truly my most favorite, although Linda Darnell at Lourdes, wearing the real gold roses is hard to beat. How different the world would be if Jesus had been a woman!
What can we do with the Christians? There are some in our midst who are doing something. Some are kicking ass, some are kissing ass, and some are too busy tending their loved ones to worry. Most people who call themselves “Christians” today are not fit to be fed to any poor lions. It would poison the innocent beasts. Of course, the best revenge will be a somewhat esoteric one. If you believe in Heaven, it will be so crowded with Gays that the Christians may have to go elsewhere. Unfortunately, some of us are getting there ahead of schedule, but isn’t that just like Queens?
